Can You Hear Me?

Google refuses to find this place, and the only other visitor that has found it has been the one I mentioned previously. This 'blog' (I really hate that word, it just sounds ugly) is kind of like a silent scream, similar to yelling my frustrations into a pillow. Except instead of a pillow it's the internet, and instead of yelling I'm typing.

Anyway, I suppose I'll start putting news up here, at least news if you knew me, which none of you do.Something a bit more positive than the problems I posted before (but that's late night thinking for you). I've started learning Russian. Don't ask why. Well I suppose you can, but I'm about to tell you anyway. I love Europe, and love the sound of Russian. The thought of being fluent in a LOTE excites me (I'm so annoyed I didn't carry on doing french in year 8, that was one thing I was good at). Uzdratzvootia! I still cant pronounce that properly (its a formal hello by the way). The word for bread can go perform erotic experimentation with a sex-deprived buffalo, I cannot pronounce it. Hclep. Hleep. kkkHleep. Screw it.

Also, hmmm. Should I say? I usually never, and I mean never about these kind of things, even to my close friends. I am very secretive by nature. At the same time, what is the point of this site if it doesn't contain some kind of personal material. That is half the fun. OK. Here goes.

I 'Like' a girl. BOOM! WHOA! HOLY CRAP I KNOW I SHOULD BE TAKEN OFF THE INTERNET FOREVER FOR SAYING THAT WOW!

What an anti-climax I know. Now you all know my gender too, all you 50 year old pedophiles looking for a supple child's body. Just kidding. Most of you pedophiles are probably not 50. Anyway. This girl. Still not sure if I really do like her. I mean, I am attracted, but my over analytical mind looks for everything wrong in such a situation. I don't actually admit 'love' until I am 100% sure. Do you really care? Does this make interesting reading? That doesn't actually matter actually, because as of yet 'you' don't exist. Its only me. And I am lonely. So lonely. OH SHIT SCHOOL WORK. I should be working on homework at the moment. Screw it. Jeezus I get off topic quickly. There I go again. Now I am making it worse. OK. Should I say her name? Hmmm. That would only be an actual issue if anyone either I or she knew found this. At this rate that seems unlikely. Ok. Her name is Stephanie. Woah that felt weird. Only actually admitted the name of the girl I like once before. Hey, if she ever sees the site, she could read this and be all 'Awww, how sweet'. Probably not actually. Most likely, if it ever happens, she would be kind of frightened. Ahh well. If you are reading this though (by you I mean Stephanie), could you not mention it to me? Because that would make it kind of awkward. At the same time, I suppose it would be good. Up to you.

Well that's a whole heap of crap up there. I mean, it is true, but I rambled on and even avoided the topic. Who avoids the topic when they're writing? Me. You are probably bored shitless. Or do you like it? Get back to me on that my imaginary readers, and I'll try to include more of what you like.

Ahh well. Its a change from all the emo poetry shit I've been putting up. Das Vidanye! (Russian for goodbye, but in English characters. It looks more awesome in Cyrillic)